I haven’t had a lot to blog about of late. I have been busy working, teaching extra classes on weekends takes up most of my Saturday and Sunday mornings are free to relax and sleep in and in the afternoon a few more classes.
I have been studying Thai around 2 hours each day; it is enjoying, but also very frustrating at times as well. Actually learning to read Thai has been the best thing I have taken on. Before when I looked at written Thai I had no idea where a word started or finished. I had no idea on how the vowels worked.
Thai is written as one long line with no gaps between words. Now I can pick words out and read them, albeit slowly. It is going to be a long time before I can read with any sort of fluency but I am on the right road now.
Last week I was informed that my niece Nong Ja is going to Bangkok for 4 months. Jack and Joom are taking her to Jack’s parent’s house and will then return to Ubon. When I asked Joom why they were doing this I got a few answers that were pretty piss poor.
Joom said, “A holiday.” When I asked why for 4 months she replied, “She needed a holiday and was tired.” Well I can tell you I was red, bright red and I let her have it.
I will not go into details but in a very brief summary I told her that she had been a poor mother to date, she needed to wake up to herself and start being a parent.
I gave her the whole, having a child is not something you just give back and forward when you are tired or bored. Sadly having a baby is a 24hr a day job and she has never been committed to this.
When we look after Ja we treat like our own child, we cook for her. We cook real vegetables for her and she loves them. Joom cooked a few times but the last few months I have never seen a container of freshly cooked vegetables.
All Ja’s meals that Joom brings for her are bought from food stalls and consist of fried rice, rice soup, noodle dishes and so forth. The additives in them I would not even wish to start to guess at.
Joom’s patience with Ja is short. Thinking a 1 year old can entertain herself while she watches TV or sings karaoke just isn’t going to happen too often. I could go on and on.
When I used to watch the girls chew food up and then put it into Ja’s mouth I was disgusted but when I said this, it was always, ‘This is Thailand.’
When you broach these things you are always met with shock and the phrase, “this is Thailand not from Farang land.”
So I haven’t seen Joom or Jack for a few days, not since I got right up them. This doesn’t worry me in the least. I couldn’t care if I didn’t see them ever again but it is Ja who I worry about.
Jack’s mum and dad are lovely people; I have had the pleasure of meeting them many times when they holiday here in Isaan. They already look after a grandson. Their daughter had a baby and they look after him for the daughter and husband who live here in Ubon Ratchathani. He comes to Ubon to see his mum and dad 4 or 5 times a year and they do travel to Bangkok to see him. In Thailand this is just such a normal thing for young parents to do.
Young Thai parents offload there children to their mum and dad, or grandpa and grandma or even relatives and then go about their daily lives. Some are lucky to actually see their kids a few times a year.
Many people who have been to a rural Thai village would have noticed many young kids about the village but mainly girls 16-30’s are absent. They are usually off working and their children are being brought up by family.
I am not really one who can judge, I was not the model father;
I was a young parent and made many mistakes, I didn’t grow up quick enough and in the end it cost me the relationship and sadly my son. I became a parent at 23 with a girl who was 26. She was mature and a smart girl who became an amazing mother to our son.
I on the other hand was an idiot and still one of the boys, going out, drinking and partying and the worst gambling, this eventually cost me the relationship.
The old if you could go back and change things line: Would I go back and change things? No, I wouldn’t.
I wish I had spent more time with my son and also had grown up and been a father but I didn’t and that is the past, and it paved the road to where I am today. Life is full of twists and turns, ups and downs and you just have to get on with it.
I just don’t want Jack and Joom to have any regrets, if Ja goes to Bangkok for 4 months they will miss so much of her early development. I also worry that when the so called 4 months are up, this holiday will be extended.
All this isn’t really my worry as Ja isn’t my daughter, but I think of her as one. I think I am trying to make Joom and Jack understand that they will not be able to get these months back. They will miss things that can never be replaced.
It is funny as I was sitting here writing this blog I heard the familiar noise of Joom’s shoes clicking on our concrete driveway, I walk out to the lounge room and here is Ja, Joom and Jack. I wasn’t informed they were coming and I simply asked, “Is she staying the night?”

No, she wasn’t.She was only staying until about 9:30pm when Jack closes his shop up and then she will go home. So that meant I had to leave this story for a few hours, but I didn’t mind at all. I got the camera out for some quick pictures.

We went for a ride on the motorbike to Big C shopping Centre and walked around the shop, she loves shopping and then off to the food stalls to buy a snack. We arrived home, fooled about for ten minutes and then Ja was tired and needed a short nap. She has stolen one of Noot’s gifts from my mum. Mum sent a koala bear as a present and Ja now makes it hers when she stays over. She bites it, shakes it, talks to it and sleeps with it.

When she awoke it was off for a warm bath and to play with her toys. Her mum and dad then arrived a little earlier than expected and she has now gone home.

The good news is that she isn’t going to Bangkok, tomorrow. She mightn’t be going until Thursday or Friday. I will wait and see.
Brunty