Thailand. Thais Avoid Confrontations because of Face.

The first time this happened was over a year ago. I had bought an Phillips iron from Big C Shopping Centre. It cost me 875 baht ($17.00 Australian) and that’s sort of expensive. It came with a 1 year guarantee and I thought looked like a good iron.

Anyway, not even one month after purchasing the iron the little dial that adjusts the temperature settings started to stick. So I mentioned to my lovely girlfriend Noot that we would take it back and she replied with the usual response 99% of Thai people come up with “Mai Pen Rai” don’t worry about it!

I said that I was worried about it; and I was going to take it back to Big C to get a replacement. Well this didn’t go down well and she got angry at me and when I told her I wanted her to come she got really angry. After 10 minutes of pleading she finally agreed to go with me.

So I packed the iron into its box that I still had and the instruction booklet and even the plastic it came in and most importantly the receipt. We headed to Big C and went to the customer service counter and then we were directed to the electrical department where I explained the problem and a few of the workers checked out the problem and then agreed it wasn’t working properly.

I was then told I had to take it to the Phillips outlet somewhere in the centre of the city. I said excuse me I bought the iron from here and I am not taking it anywhere else. You sold it to me not the Phillips outlet in town. Again a lot of Thai was spoke and heads shook and nodded. Then my lovely girl said that we had to take it there as it wasn’t Big C’s problem. Well that’s where they were wrong. Noot just wanted to get out of there. There had been no angry voices or anything at this time just plain talking.

I asked to see the manager on duty and everyone looked blankly at me I repeated myself and 1 salesman said it wouldn’t make a difference. So at this point I raised my voice and asked for a manager who spoke some English. At this point Noot turned around and walked off, I knew that she must have been leaving and if she wanted to go home she had to walk as I had the keys for the motorbike and house.

I let her go and stood my ground and after 10 minutes a lady in a red shirt came and tried to speak English which was very bad and again told me I had to take the ion to Phillips. So now this Farang was losing his cool a little and told them I wasn’t taking it anywhere. I asked about my television and surround sound stereo and cooking equipment I had bought from there that if any of them broke down would I have to take them to a service centre myself and the rice cooker came from Japan so would I have to fly there and give it to them myself.

This they just couldn’t understand. How can they think it is not their responsibility to organize something that they had sold that had broken to be fixed or replaced? I asked if she was the number 1 lady or man in charge and was told no that he had gone home but would be back tomorrow. So I took my iron and with no thank you left and went home. Noot was sitting on the porch waiting to get into the house and looking very angry. I knew better to say anything but couldn’t help myself.

Why did you leave? No answer. Asked again and I was told in a stern Thai voice to stop talking “Yut Phutt”. So better than having a huge argument over something so silly I left it at that.

The next day I didn’t even dare to ask Noot to go with me to Big C. I went and seen the man in charge and he was very nice and spoke English very bad but understood when I said I was leaving the iron with him and would be back tomorrow to retrieve it. He understood this and he went along with it. I have no idea if he sent it to Phillips or one of his staff tried to fix it but the next night when I picked it up the dial was fine. Well fine for 2 months and then it happened again and even then I said “don’t worry about it”.

I have had food that was terrible salty and when I told Noot this and wanted to return it she thought I was insane and wouldn’t let me do it. I got looks that could kill a man from 100 feet.

And then today, I watched some rugby league of TV this morning on the Australian Channel and then taught 2 extra classes at my home and then went to watch some Australian Rules Football (AFL) but the Australian Channel had disappeared. It had been replaced by BBC World. I was like NO! Not pommy television all day.

I found my cable TV providers phone number and asked Noot to call and ask what had happened and again she was against the idea of just calling to make the enquiry. Why I asked and I got a dirty look again. So after again pleading she made the call.

We where told that they had put the BBC World programme on for a month and then replace it again with the Australian Channel. I wasn’t told this happened when I had cable TV installed. I wanted to know if there was any way to get it put on separately but Noot wouldn’t listen to me and hung up. Again she looked very angry and just walked out of the room. I tried to enquire but got very angry looks and decided to leave it at that.

She went to her friends house and I had a very pleasant and quiet afternoon and evening. The only problem is I cannot watch the AFL game tonight and there is a really big game on Monday with my team Collingwood V’s Melbourne and will have 90,000 plus people live at the ground for the Queens Birthday game.

So tomorrow I am going to have my Thai friend who speaks very good English ring the cable company and see what I can work out with them as I don’t care for BBC at all really.

So why are Thai people so embarrassed at confrontation? The only reason I can possibly think of is that they think they are losing “face”. Thai people are really obsessed about this “face” thing. It’s like a social standing or respect and it means so much to Thais. Many Thai people have killed each other over this face thing and I really think it’s stupid the way the people hold it such high esteem.

A simple gesture at a person for doing something stupid on the road can cause a loss of face if other people see it and some people will react really aggressively and even fatally. It’s a really confusing thing and I really don’t understand it and I am sure the Thais don’t even understand it.

It’s frustrating but again I am a visitor in Thailand and have to try and understand the sometimes strange Thai ways but again it is also a lovely and beautiful country and the country Isaan people are wonderful.

Brunty